Michelle

My husband Chris is someone who is slim and stays that way.  His weight varies little whether he’s active or not, and seemingly irrespective of what he eats.  So when I started my fitness journey in 2005, some of what I dealt with wasn’t part of his experience and was difficult for him to understand. There were times when it felt like he was sabotaging my efforts, and other times when he said and did things I felt were unhelpful. That said, he also genuinely tried to be supportive when he better understood what I was trying to do. And he wholeheartedly agreed to my going to a trainer, which was no small amount of money. So here I am, nearly seven years after I started and significantly smaller than I was at the beginning of our marriage in 1994. Here’s what Chris has to say.

What is your ‘take-away’ from my fitness journey?

It really rubbed off on me. I became more concerned about my own fitness. For example, despite not being a runner, I did the Sun Run a few years after you, and I started rollerblading more. I became more concerned about my overall health despite my thinner appearance.  Research shows your peer group impacts your lifestyle; I understand that trying to change yourself is harder when you’re hanging out with people who are still part of the old lifestyle, which in many ways I was. Although I wasn’t fat, I was out of shape (a skinny fat person) and suspect I had more dangerous visceral fat than I would have thought. So I started getting fitter as I saw you getting fitter.

What would you say was the biggest surprise as I worked towards my fitness goals?

The main thing I was impressed, astounded, confused, blown away by was your willpower and stick-to-itiveness. Getting up at some ungodly hour in the middle of winter to go running was astounding. There was obviously a fire that was lit in you and I wasn’t quite sure what the fire was or where it came from. It was actually a bit baffling, but at the same time great!  Wouldn’t it be great if I could get that amount of steely determination in some areas of my life!

If you had anything to say to other partners/supporters of someone on a fitness journey, what would it be?

To be honest, I wasn’t always as encouraging as I could have been. Right from the outset it would have been good for me to be 100% on board. So, be supportive of the person and do things that help them achieve their goals.  Don’t bring fattening foods around the house. Don’t say things like, “Come on! I’m having a doughnut; you can have one too.”  Not tempting her would have been better. And here’s a shameless plug: “for your abs, ten minutes of all out laughter is equal to 20 minutes on a rowing machine.”[Chris is a laughter yoga leader and I can attest, he does indeed have great abs!]

So in a nutshell, his advice boils down to “do everything you can to be helpful and supportive, and laugh a lot!”